This application for the Parallel Perception Scholarship Program was submitted by Eder Nunez. If you would like to vote for Eder please leave a comment at the end of this blog post.
It is a challenge trying to describe what’s really been going on ever since the Universe understood my desperate need to be confronted by the works of the nagual Lujan Matus :). I now understand why this a sentiment often echoed… how can one apply a sense of coherence and rational understanding to a transformational process that more closely resembles magic.
Lujan reminds us that the Universe will not always give us what we want but will with certainty present us with what we need. The arrival of his teachings into my life bear true testament to this wonderful truth.
I remember.. weeping with joy and relief as I realized that despite having wallowed so deeply shit (short story long on excuses and self pity) there was still hope for someone like me, a chance to stand up as my true self.. learning that through will and courage, we can face our deepest fears and reclaim our silence, our heritage.. being profoundly moved by the certainty that the Universe eagerly awaits our return to form, to live fully in its eternal embrace.. ecstatic to be reminded that our destiny lies in recovering what we knew and treasured most as children: our freedom, our voice, our heart.
As awareness and clarity increase they make it all too obvious that this is an ongoing process that offers no short cuts and while challenging at times it no doubt gets easier as power increases. Slowly but surely the fear has subsided thus allowing the heart glimpses of direct experience and wonder once again.
Each new day makes it harder to ignore the loops and imprints, to rationalize away acts without integrity, to hide from the need to get over the shadow self. Sure, the bad days are still there and occasionally, a really bad one when the lingering shadow aspects threaten to destroy all progress and return me to victimhood.. but even those have been imbued with the power to transform as catalysts that expose the deepest imprints while releasing negative energy.
The increase in awareness means I can no longer hide from the fact that the change I would like to see in the world will never come about unless I am willing to become a mirror-like reflection of that very change. The teachings of the nagual speak directly to this.. the yearning to manifest a world of harmony, equilibrium and respect for the natural order.
At this point on my path I cannot conceive of a greater privilege than the opportunity to meet and learn from Lujan Matus. Reading the testimonials of his students, listening to his gentle voice/joyous laughter on the cosmic giggle documentary, observing the progress my perception has experienced over the past year.. these factors and others have formed a tapestry of sweet longing to come in direct contact with the catalyst his impeccable example would undoubtedly represent.
There is no telling whether the Universe will deem this encounter necessary in my near future and that’s ok as I know things will transpire as they should. What is most telling is the yearning that now stirs in the deepest recess of my heart and my silence to continue forward with this process until my mind forgets the word freedom and my heart fully realizes that there is nothing else..
It is humbling and exciting realizing that I’ve only begun scratching the foamy surface of the sea of infinite potential that reside in these timeless teachings and for that I harbor the deepest gratitude for the nagual and his wonderful community of warriors at parallel perception who share with boundless generosity their love and wisdom. Gracias!
Photo courtesy of The Wandering Angel