The Power to Stand Up Over and Over Again With Love and Gratitude Against All Odds

cosmic-giggle-shaman

This application for the Parallel Perception Scholarship  was submitted by Mohammed Alaeddin (Dino). 

This year the scholarship includes a choice of either: attendance at the Dragon’s Tears Workshop in the Canary Islands from August 2nd-8th – or – participation on the online Transformational Healing and Meditation program.

If you would like to offer your support for Dino please leave a comment at the end of this blog post.

Last year I came across the movie The Cosmic Giggle and since then I watched it many times rewinding and forwarding to your clips just to keep hearing your voice. There are times when I listen to what you are saying and the tears flow uncontrollably but even when they don’t there seems to be a pleading for something inside but I have no idea what for. At one time I wrote what you were saying in my journal as a means of integrating the wisdom into myself.

After watching it the first time I began to download and read your books starting with the Whisperings of The Dragon, strange that I actually bought and downloaded the books in reverse to how they are listed on your website.

Something in me shifted as soon as I began reading. My dreams became much more intense in the sense that they reflected what was happening in real life on a current basis. Especially the bad ones, they happen quickly and include all the negative thoughts I go about burying during the day. It’s like my subconscious is throwing back at me all the negativity I am trying to ignore in the same way they cross my conscious mind.

Last week I had one where by the scene kept changing to include everyone I have been in contact with during the past day and how their negative opinions of me that I fear kept playing out. Friends, employees and romantic interests mainly, it was so upsetting I kept trying to wake up but I couldn’t even though I thought I did. It ended by waking up to my apartment in the dark to find that the front door was open but again I was still sleeping, that scene put me in a state of fear to finally wake me up sweating heavily.

These dreams happen when I allow myself to get caught up in the social eddy and I absorb so much negativity. When I am rested mentally they are just as intense but are focused on nature, like the sea and animals. A few weeks ago I had dream of a hatching octopus on the shore although I have never actually seen one.

On the surface I am a fortunate individual, I have a family that cares about me, friends that surround me, a stressful but rewarding job running a restaurant and I am healthy although I manage to destroy it with smoking and drinking heavily. I am extremely intuitive and sensitive to my surroundings. I am also blessed with so much problem solving creativity.

I live in Jordan, a poor country surrounded by wars and suffering. Now the madness is knocking on our doors once more. The wars removed my parents from their homes in Palestine and Lebanon, then it removed our family from Kuwait. We are told that we can think and act freely but the truth is we can not and people might listen but nothing is changing. I see people losing their humanity on a daily basis while we all go about our business and I am just as guilty but I am becoming aware of it and it has begun to hurt badly.

I can see so many events unfolding, there are many out there now trying to bring about an apocalypse and I don’t want to remain idle. My problem is that I keep getting caught in the social eddy and I don’t have the discipline to change but paradoxically I am also suffering because I keep feeling a calling within. So much of my energy is being wasted by an over thinking worrying mind. My parents have always been over protective of me even now at age 39, and I have become dependent on them which doesn’t help if I am to truly grow and give my power back to society.

I am reading ‘Whisperings of the Dragon’ for the second time and things are beginning to unfold around me and from within once more as it did the first time last summer but I want to be able to apply the knowledge with much more integrity. There is something inside of me that wants to be unlocked and I know that only through your voice speaking directly to me this can happen. I can not do it alone, I don’t have the courage or discipline to.

Thank you.

Mohammed Alaeddin (everyone calls me Dino)

me

 

 

 

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8 Comments
  1. May you find what integrity can bring to you, Dino.

  2. Reading this moved me because your voice comes from a place in the world where there is so much upheaval and you are in the midst of that pain. Even your picture reflects the sorrow. Do not suffer from the “calling within.” Go inward with gratefulness. Practice the Eight Gates. Keep your eye on the ball, as we say in America. : ) The very best to you, Dino, from a compatriot half way around the world.

  3. :)

  4. The inner child suffers in all of us. When we start to unveil its beauty, to uncover, step by step, it’s unmasked, uncloaked nature, miraculous things start to happen, isn’t it? I was touched by your beautiful and simple description of how Lujan’s books are shaping your dreams and chaning your perspective on life. Be well!

  5. Much courage and discipline to you Dino. Your account here shows examples how connected we all are. Stay strong, stay heart-centered, this is what the world needs, though it may feel like you are going to break at times.

  6. Dearest Mohammed;
    Thank you for sharing your inner turmoil. I appreciate how you can see how you get caught up in the social eddy, yet you feel pulled inward to find your true heart. Keep swimming toward what you feel to be true!
    Love, Georgina

    • I felt connected to each one of you and I am so grateful for your advice to stay true to my heart, even if it feels painful at times, there can be no other way.

      With all my heart, thank you!
      Dino

  7. What an intense account. You make it clear that our soul searching is no idle game. Despite your fear, it doesn’t look like you’ll be remaining idle. I feel faith and excitement wondering how your impact is going to play out. Probably like all of us, you seem to be in the right place at the right time. Tread lightly.

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