Since stumbling across the teachings of Lujan Matus my life has continued to unfold in ways in which I could never have previously imagined. The concepts detailed in his books, the physical aspect of Lo Ban Pai and the internal art of Kung Fu have all brought about significant realisation and direction in my journey of personal transformation and growth.
Having attended the Golden Lotus workshop in Germany last year and worked in online sessions of guidance with The Nagual, I thought I was well equipped for my trip to the Bahamas to study Dragon’s Tears. I was excited about my journey, and rightly so. I wondered what I was going to learn, what would be spoken, realised, shared, and brought back home with me once I had finished the training.
I arrived with everything, all of which was seen. It was only a matter of minutes before I was confronted. Stumbling on myself I felt caught with no place to hide. All I could do was surrender and allow myself to unfold. I had walked into a situation so confronting all I could do was cry.
Lujan’s focus on me was intense and he spoke directly to the core of my agendas. The truth of myself was hard to hear but I knew in my heart that I didn’t want or need to be that person anymore. The first week was incredibly challenging and I felt the emotions I had been carrying my whole life come to the surface. Lujan wasted no time in bringing my poison to the surface and my violent, aggressive and manipulative agendas were revealed.
As I practiced at my apartment all I could feel was the pressing of those truths on my heart. The movements I was learning became my comfort, directing me to truth. The medicine of Dragon’s Tears became nurturing – I could hold my own heart for what felt like the first time. I wept in those moments of silence and allowed emotions to come forth without resistance or interference.
As the 2-week program progressed I could feel myself shifting as I aligned with my heart. I was becoming more aware of myself and able to feel relief from the realisations of the actions of the life I have lived.
Lujan brought my attention to the fact I had a big problem on my hands.
“I am Lujan, I am a Shaman. Who are you?”
I couldn’t answer, I don’t know who I am. I know who I am not. I am not ‘John’. In and amongst the confrontation there was plenty of time to laugh too and this helped me to remove the weight of my realisations when appropriate.
Within the challenges and inspirations, lies somethings beautiful. I am aligning deeply with my heart and finding courage to find my truth and take responsibility for myself. This is my quest, my journey. With the accompaniment of Lo Ban Pai I have a magical practice and discipline to assist me.
I look forward to continuing my training.
With gratitude and love.