I just want to say thank you to everyone contributing to Parallel Perception. Reading your heartfelt words has been an inspirational resource for me. I’ve not contributed for some time, and now I feel I want to share my heartfelt feelings.
I can feel an increasing inner stability and awareness through practicing the 8 Gates meditation. I know I need to be patient but sometimes I need to understand why I am here and how I can move away from my present situation.
Over the last 7 years I am surrounded by family who have given me a place to stay but have become totally dependent on me through their physical disabilities. So much goes on here to activate negative thought’s in my head, and so many times I resolve to listen to what I can’t hear and see inwardly what I can’t see, and then the punisher comes in to tell me I’ve failed again.
It chastises me for thinking about or being sarcastic, or making an insinuation or just plain swearing in my head. I notice my thought’s act upon one another like I’m being set up, even though I am genuinely in my heart a kind person and act upon my kindness everyday. I thought there was fertile ground for growing here and I can clearly hear the desperados inside my head, I can feel how my sense of duty (OCD) and self depreciation and the need for validation suppress my inner Child.
I’ve resolved many times to regularly practice 8 Gates because I see the difference in quality within myself and how I move through my situation. Before I practiced 8 Gate’s I felt like I was climbing through thorny rose bushes, and since this practice I feel more fluid.
I read in Lujan’s books about the imprints and pressures of the social construct surrounding us and these two paragraph’s on page 92, Whisperings of the Dragon resonate with me:
If a shaman is reborn and does not recommence his journey, thus retrieving the information previously accessed, the filaments, the light fibers, will disconnect, due to the fact that the two percent of his attention has failed to reach out to his full potential to retrieve his past memories.
Thus he will wander lost to himself within the social knowings and doings that will encompass him within his present lifetime, instead of the not-doing of who he was and can become.
I have at times practiced my 8 gates meditation when it’s late and I end up falling asleep. I ask myself now as I write, why don’t I make this profound and mysterious practice my priority and reach my full potential?
Thank you all for listening.
The most profound state of awareness comes from being devoted to your present circumstances, absorbing the sorrows and joys of others, so that you may see yourself within them, which in actuality is you.
Don’t let the socialized mind beat you up and reduce you to nothing. For in essence you are already there; dissolved and have become everything. This in turn reduces you and only wisdom and kindness can grow from this reduction.