It has taken me some time to come to a place where I could begin sharing my recent experience with Lujan. Over the last couple of weeks since coming back home, I have been looking for words that would describe my experience and yet, found the search to be quite challenging. The ‘right’ words seem to be suspended in mid air, close enough to be seen but far enough to stay safely out of my reach as if they refuse to be captured and brought down to paper (or screen, I should say).
Much unfolded during the three weeks I spent with Lujan and much more keeps unfolding and slowly integrating now that I am back home. For example, while I was developing my morning practice (from my initial week learning about Awakening the Energy Body) during my second week with Lujan, I kept expecting to see those ‘famous’ golden filaments coming out of my fingers.
I told Lujan that I was seeing no gold; I was seeing black instead. My hands had ‘shadows’ – black fingers elongating out of my actual fingers. I did not feel freaked out, but puzzled – what is this?
When I told Lujan, I felt his excitement as he explained to me that what I was beginning to directly experience was dark matter – the Empty Force or Void. These events combined with the conversations we shared brought us to a place where Lujan decided to introduce me to other aspects I was to incorporate as part of my morning practice to further opening the lower dantien and deepening my experience with the Empty Force.
Lujan instructed me on the cultivation of sexual energy – the female version of Primordial Shen Gong – as part of my morning practice. Lujan warned me that the practice aimed at riding and pacifying “the wild horse”, the sexual desires that can take us over, demanding fulfillment, sometimes at all costs and thus resulting in behaviors that lack integrity and keep humanity locked into basal stage of evolution.
To me, this new addition felt like some sort of ‘fast-tracking’ process (although I realize that I cannot fast-track anything and what happened for me was simply what I was ready to see and experience. As such, the idea of ‘fast-tracking’ doesn’t make much sense but it is the best word I can find for now). Almost immediately after including the sexual practice, for example, I started experiencing the arrival of 3D imagery during the meditation I do to close my morning practice. The images would appear out of nowhere and would be slightly rotating onto an invisible axis to disappear as soon as I attempted to ‘look’ at them rather than fleetingly ‘glance’ at them.
Lujan explained that these experiences where an initial sign for the opening of a gate for communication and communion with the galactic space and beyond. I felt very excited and encouraged to learn that there is a way out of the madness that we are experiencing in our world today. The way towards our own evolution is simple and clear. All we need to do is practice!
So, I continued my practice upon my return home. I have finally started to better understand some of the teaching I received. Over the last couple of days, I have felt into some of the movements Lujan has taught me – they were just movements at first and I just did them every morning as I was told. But these very same movements (at least some of them) are quickly becoming more than movements. I am not sure if I can explain this properly, but it feels as if I am moving my body by tracing lines I have sketched before. The empty space finds me and I find it, and the movement occurs in this state of reciprocity.
For example, I am making no effort to move my hands into a circular shape in front of my belly; my hands simply ‘find’ the circle and move into it, then the circle moves them. At that point, the space between my hands and my belly becomes ‘distorted’ – somehow, the image wobbles and the edges of things become undefined in the same way they do when you look at something in the distance on hot asphalt. In that narrow space created between my hands and my belly, electrified particles glitter like dust in sunlight. So every morning, my practice is gifting me with a new appreciation of the natural way to move as a body in space.
From a space of gratitude for the teachings Lujan has gifted me with true care and so much love, I keep ‘discovering’ movements out of the movements I am doing. And every morning, I feel like I am painting a masterpiece in the void.