The Nagual’s Double – Part Three

“Look at me.” He is standing at my feet. The voice conveys a sense of urgency. “Take a look at what is in this room. See what is around you!” Lujan’s face moves like a mirage. I realize I am dreaming.

“Yes, I will.” I reply. Inwardly I do not feel up to the task.

“Quiet! Don’t say anything.” He commands. I become alarmed by my circumstance, remembering he has previously instructed me on the uselessness of talking instead of acting. My words cannot substitute for doing the thing now, without mental interference. I am already at a disadvantage. I have lost time.

My focus turns to the room. I struggle for a foothold into my surroundings. A fluttering brushes my left side but I cannot see what it is. My eyes are useless but I can sense its identity. I recognize it as a kind of emotional feeling. It is formless. I want to tell Lujan but he is moving and not receptive to words. He relocates around to my left and stands behind me. There is no time to turn around and view him. Many “feelings” are gathering in the room. They advance towards me. I use my arms and hands in a brushing motion to sweep the sensations down and away as they present themselves. With great effort I achieve some success.

“Leia,” I hear my name and awaken. “Leia,” a voice again calls my name out loud. “I’m here,” I reply. I am talking to myself. I hear the call of a gecko. Yes, I think to myself, I am awake now. Sitting up I look around the bungalow. My last memory is of lying down in the afternoon to rest. Night has come to the field. The plants are glowing under a blanket of mist, still warm from sunning themselves. I leave to go see Lujan.


He sits cross-legged on the path facing the field. I sit down. There is a full moon overhead. The cricket’s opus is underway.

He directs me to look at a very bright star. “The big one there?” I ask. “Yes that one.” He affirms. I move forward to remove a telephone wire out of my line of vision to the star. Lujan adjusts himself in the other direction. “I want you to keep looking at the star. Just keep watching it.”

After a few minutes the star begins to shrink. “You see the star shrinking?” He asks. “Yes.” I tell him. “Now it is almost gone, it is disappearing,” he continues. I nod my agreement. “Now it is getting bigger again. It is forming a hourglass shape like it is going to split in two.” He narrates exactly what I have seen seconds after I witness it. “All right. Now I want you to shrink it back to its original size.”

I commence efforts to shrink the bulging star. I have no idea how to do this. It returns to its original size. “Keep watching it. Gaze directly into it.” He doesn’t miss a beat. As I watch, the star begins to weave to the left and then to the right. Lujan describes the movement. It weaves more drastically back and forth left to right until it is swaying like the pendulum on a grandfather clock. Lujan says as much. “It is moving faster now…tick tock tick tock,” he keeps time with each swing. It quickens and shortens from side to side until the star is vibrating rapidly, then stops.

“Now let’s have a look at the moon. This is a very powerful moon,” he says. He guides me through a series of gazing maneuvers with the moon. He then directs me to gaze at a point below the moon. I lower my eyes. The moon begins to move up. It is rising in the sky. Then it stops. I am just about to say something when it starts moving again. It is swimming like a tadpole quickly climbing up, then stops. It feels like my heart has climbed with it. My heart feels lifted, ascending with the moon. I turn my head to look at Lujan, wondering if he has seen. “Keep watching,” he whispers. In a burst it is on the move again, swimming quickly up it seems it might disappear. It has gone up but also out, away from us, settling deep into space.

“Look at the star.” He directs my attention back to the original star. “Do you notice anything?” He asks. I am still in awe over the moon. “Look at the position of the star,” he coaxes. At first I don’t see anything. Then I notice the star is way back under the telephone wire. I distinctly remember the star was over the wire when I gazed at it. Its position has shifted dramatically.

I wonder if we have been out here for a longer time than I realized. “We have been out here for 10 or 15 minutes,” Lujan answers my thought.

“What happened in the sky is a movement in the fabric of space.”


Lujan sits in the grass behind a little rise of earth and motions me to join him. He is in silence for a long time. My mind wanders. I look out over the rice field. I can see the lights of my bungalow and the shirt I hung out to dry after washing. There is no wind. The stream is making a splashing sound on the other side of the path. After awhile it begins to sound like music. “The stream is singing Om Padme Siddhi OM.” Lujan says, breaking his silence. “It would be good to just lie by the stream all day and listen.”

“Can you see my shadow on the tree?” He asks. I hadn’t noticed it. In fact I didn’t even notice there was a huge tree just a little ways in front of us. Lujan’s shadow is positioned perfectly within it. He looks at me to make sure I see and focuses back on the tree. “I am going to make my shadow very still, very crisp,” he informs me. As I watch his shadow seems to darken, forming a sharp outline of dark against the tree. It is clear, like a figure in black on white paper. There is something tranquil about the shadow. It gives me a feeling of confidence to look at it. As I watch his shadow it begins to vibrate and expand. It starts to move like an image on the surface of water that has been disturbed. He narrates exactly what I am seeing. His words disturb what I have told myself, that I imagined what I saw.

Something begins to move on his shoulder. His shadow seems to be growing there. Then something leaps out of his shoulder. It has the shape of a gopher popping out of a hole. It is very pronounced. Again, he verbally confirms what I have already seen.

“Lets switch places.” He says, like we are playing a game. We trade places. He tells me to make my shadow move the same way his did. “Picture raising your arm above your head but keep your arm relaxed.” He coaches me. Nothing happens. After several minutes I manage a small bulge from the top of my shoulder. “Make your shadow very clear and still.” He switches my task. I watch my shadow become more solid with a clear outline. It appears calm and peaceful. “Now make your shadow vibrate.” He commands. I look at my shadow and tell it to vibrate. It seems to work. I can see it vibrating. I receive a “good” from Lujan.

We switch places. Lujan tells me he wants to make flames come out of his shoulder. “No,” he says, “I’m going to try something else.” I watch his shadow intently, waiting to see what happens. Suddenly a light appears on his shoulder. It fans out like an accordion and drops down six or seven folds of light from the top of his shoulder. It finishes in a ball of light, then evaporates into the darkness.

This time I’m sure I have imagined the effect. Again, like subtitles in a movie, he recites exactly what I have seen, narrating each detail. Very purposefully he explains that he has corroborated what I have seen. In fact, he has corroborated everything I have seen.

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